Welcome to the Just Beautiful Newsletter where I write about making space for beauty and justice to meet, share about our journey from tinyhouse living to a home on 3 acres, and give you too many links.
I contemplated this question quite often in music school. It seemed to me, that in the studying of composers and great musicians there really were only two categories. There were those who worshipped the Creator and thus were able to withstand the pressure of being a co-creator. Or it seemed to me that eventually the same creative genius eventually eats one from the inside if not rightly ordered. The pressure of being the one that creates seems to be too much if we think it comes only from ourselves. I don’t know that it answers the question of these mothers being judged more harshly, but I wonder if perhaps motherhood also tethers to reality in a way that those with the “luxury” of going off by themselves don’t experience.
Okay, I love this perspective! And yes, this idea that you HAVE to be "grounded" (whether you want to be or not) if you are a mother is very interesting.
Loved this article, Steph! I have also often wrestled all of these questions, especially the question of greatness (excellence) and goodness (character) in people and whether or not the two can (or very often do) co-exist. As you make clear, it seems to be hard to give what it takes to be an excellent public anything, much less a writer, and keep it together in other areas of life. Mandela sacrificed his family for a democratic South Africa. Einstein's wife (and apparent collaborator on his special theory of relativity) divorced him after he was unfaithful to her (https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/guest-blog/the-forgotten-life-of-einsteins-first-wife/). Maybe the problem is not the "fallen" heroes but our misunderstanding about human nature. Maybe we shouldn't have heroes at all. There is only One who is truly great and truly good. Could we redefine greatness somehow and be more honest about what we write at the bottom of our statues and in our history books? Public heroes probably all have secret sins. Secret, unsung heroes don't need to be perfect. They are too busy being good to become great. I think I am ok with that.
I wonder about our wish for heroes though -- is it all bad? It's human nature to be fallen, but also human nature to want heroes - people who really "did it". It could be, though, that this "hero worship" is misdirected. And it always tends to go badly (I was reading something about Elisabeth Elliot the other day painting Jim Eliot in a certain light because 'kids need heroes', and i understand the instinct but it never ends well). I was also thinking about this in terms of all this spiritual "fallen heroes" the church is seeing at the moment. There are just so many more eyes now because of social media, how horrible a person is is way more publicly accessible. There was an interesting CT article about a guy doing his PhD research in "great evangelicals in history" and as a result his prayer was, "let me not end up great" because they all were horrible people.
Stephanie, this topic seems so relevant given what is happening in the (Disunited) States of America right now. Sadly, women have been discriminated against for centuries, and the attitudes towards artistic women who happen to be not so nice people comes as no surprise. It's not just male artists who get a pass on bad behavior, but also politicians, businessmen, scientists, actors, and clergymen, etc. Now I want to Google famous males in history who excelled at their craft, but were also good people. Are there any? Love your articles!
SO, I was going to put this in the article and then totally FORGOT! But I think that one reason people were so excited for Jon Baptiste to win 5 Grammy's is that (so far! haha!) it seems like his is genuinely a nice guy. He's a great partner to his wife Suleika Jaouad who is battling cancer, and really wants his music to build community and bring people together -- to participate in it -- rather than be a famous star. He really just loves music THAT much. Of course, who really knows what people are like! But I just thought it was interesting seeing how many people were so happy for him and commenting on who he was as a person, and not just his art.
I contemplated this question quite often in music school. It seemed to me, that in the studying of composers and great musicians there really were only two categories. There were those who worshipped the Creator and thus were able to withstand the pressure of being a co-creator. Or it seemed to me that eventually the same creative genius eventually eats one from the inside if not rightly ordered. The pressure of being the one that creates seems to be too much if we think it comes only from ourselves. I don’t know that it answers the question of these mothers being judged more harshly, but I wonder if perhaps motherhood also tethers to reality in a way that those with the “luxury” of going off by themselves don’t experience.
Okay, I love this perspective! And yes, this idea that you HAVE to be "grounded" (whether you want to be or not) if you are a mother is very interesting.
Loved this article, Steph! I have also often wrestled all of these questions, especially the question of greatness (excellence) and goodness (character) in people and whether or not the two can (or very often do) co-exist. As you make clear, it seems to be hard to give what it takes to be an excellent public anything, much less a writer, and keep it together in other areas of life. Mandela sacrificed his family for a democratic South Africa. Einstein's wife (and apparent collaborator on his special theory of relativity) divorced him after he was unfaithful to her (https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/guest-blog/the-forgotten-life-of-einsteins-first-wife/). Maybe the problem is not the "fallen" heroes but our misunderstanding about human nature. Maybe we shouldn't have heroes at all. There is only One who is truly great and truly good. Could we redefine greatness somehow and be more honest about what we write at the bottom of our statues and in our history books? Public heroes probably all have secret sins. Secret, unsung heroes don't need to be perfect. They are too busy being good to become great. I think I am ok with that.
I wonder about our wish for heroes though -- is it all bad? It's human nature to be fallen, but also human nature to want heroes - people who really "did it". It could be, though, that this "hero worship" is misdirected. And it always tends to go badly (I was reading something about Elisabeth Elliot the other day painting Jim Eliot in a certain light because 'kids need heroes', and i understand the instinct but it never ends well). I was also thinking about this in terms of all this spiritual "fallen heroes" the church is seeing at the moment. There are just so many more eyes now because of social media, how horrible a person is is way more publicly accessible. There was an interesting CT article about a guy doing his PhD research in "great evangelicals in history" and as a result his prayer was, "let me not end up great" because they all were horrible people.
Stephanie, this topic seems so relevant given what is happening in the (Disunited) States of America right now. Sadly, women have been discriminated against for centuries, and the attitudes towards artistic women who happen to be not so nice people comes as no surprise. It's not just male artists who get a pass on bad behavior, but also politicians, businessmen, scientists, actors, and clergymen, etc. Now I want to Google famous males in history who excelled at their craft, but were also good people. Are there any? Love your articles!
SO, I was going to put this in the article and then totally FORGOT! But I think that one reason people were so excited for Jon Baptiste to win 5 Grammy's is that (so far! haha!) it seems like his is genuinely a nice guy. He's a great partner to his wife Suleika Jaouad who is battling cancer, and really wants his music to build community and bring people together -- to participate in it -- rather than be a famous star. He really just loves music THAT much. Of course, who really knows what people are like! But I just thought it was interesting seeing how many people were so happy for him and commenting on who he was as a person, and not just his art.